The Great (Cold) Outdoors

Things I Learned While Camping With a Two Year-Old

1. All it takes for my normally neat and fastidious son to play in the dirt is a shovel and someone to play with.
2. My son’s ability to ask “What’s that?”, if harnessed to some kind of generator, could power every nation on the Earth.
3. Air mattresses are highly, highly over-rated. Furthermore, the danger to mankind due to air mattresses isn’t. The valley of death caused by a half-inflated air mattress, having a very slow leak while nothing is on it but a very fast one with two, fully-grown adults trying to sleep on it, is not to be underestimated. This is not, in any way, made any easier by a two year-old who insists he sleep with mommy and daddy (or, in the case of Friday night, on mommy).
4. Connor likes movies. Or at least he sat very still and was very quiet for the entire duration of The Croods, which was a cute movie.
5. Forty degrees is a lot colder than you think it will be, especially when you don’t have proper gear to sleep in. However, Marovich children, at least according to my wife, function as miniature space heaters.
6. Anything can have a dragon in it. Anything. This isn’t a bad thing.
7. It is entirely fascinating to watch my son be fascinated by everything. I have no concept of what it’s like to be consciously aware and making so many discoveries so quickly, experiencing so many new things all at once. It’s really awesome to see.
8. My son could, if allowed, eat his entire body weight in soft-serve ice cream.
9. “Come on, daddy!” is one of my new, favorite three-word phrases.
10. My son’s ability to hear, and repeat, any curse word or swear I mutter is profoundly scary.

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One Response to The Great (Cold) Outdoors

  1. Ammy says:


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